That's it I'm done

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Me and the husband were talking, we are finally pregnant with our second child and we couldn’t be happier. We have been married 9 years in October this year and together for 12 years. That’s a long bloody time, we always joke we would get less for murder.
Wedding picture
Now the whole 9 years of our marriage has been centred around us having children and that realisation hit me like a brick. For most people it’s so simple having children. You miss the pill and have a drunken night and there you go nine months down the line you have a beautiful bundle. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that that is how life was intended.
But for some it’s not meant to be that easy. I cannot honestly say how much I have spent on prescriptions and hospital parking over the last 10 years, it’s probably not as much as IVF (if you would like to read about my IVF journey you can do here) but it will be close. All the hospital visits have been a nightmare.
Being prodded and poked constantly, building my hopes up and being let down and just being on this emotional roller coaster for the last decade has made me decide this baby is definitely my last.
I was having tests done back in November last year where my sonographer looked at me with those practiced eyes and told me the drugs weren’t working. The amount of times I have heard that sentence I’m quite practiced in the art of keeping my face neutral. Till I get in the car anyway. So, I was made an appointment for Valentines day this year.
Two heart shaped mugs
What a great day to be told nothing is going to happen and there’s nothing more that can be done for me. However, he didn’t tell me that. He sat me down and told me there was hope. Something that I had completely lost sight of. He told me I had a condition called lean PCOS. I have never heard of it and neither had any of my friends. He told me to go home and do some research.
I started a new course of tablets, metformin to control the lean PCOS and something called Myo-inositol. This was a powder I put in fresh orange juice and drank twice a day. This helps with the symptoms of PCOS and something I have never thought of taking.
We also had to take a tablet called Chlomid to help conceive. We honestly didn’t think it would happen and this was our last chance before we had to pay for IVF which we couldn’t afford. I had plenty of scans to see if the drugs were finally working, and my sonographer who coincidently was called Erica, was fabulous with me. She told me the drugs were working finally.
Two weeks later we got a very faint positive, I couldn’t believe it. I was in complete shock we didn’t expect this to happen. We checked a second time and let the hospital know straight away. 2 weeks later I had my first scan and my first glimpse of pip.
Scan picture
So, as you can tell with everything that it takes for me to conceive this is definitely my last baby. I am not going through all this again, being poked and prodded.
We are over the moon that we are expecting our second child and we realise just how lucky we are, I am hoping by writing this someone somewhere will read this and it will help them. Hope is not always lost, sometimes its just very hard to find.
Looks like I am going to need a new mug and stock up on some more coffee before this baby arrives. Thank you for reading.

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1 comment

  • So pleased for you all. Brilliant that you are sharing your story and helping to build awareness of this invisible illness x


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